It Is A Mystery...

[Basil Benson]

The staircase seemed to take them down a level or two before unceremoniously dumping them into a very tiny room. This room was decorated as if it were a detective's office, a bookcase lining over half of one of the walls. A gentleman in period appropriate attire greeted that.

" Good evening, do you have an appointment? "

"Yes, under Bazyli Stolarz."

"Ah yes, how may we help?"

Basil allowed Colette to sit in the one provided seat, letting her to take the lead.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette carefully tucked her dress as she sat with legs crossed, her purse held upon her lap as she settled herself. She lifted her eyes timidly toward the well-dressed man.

"Monsieur, my... associate has told me zat you are adept at solving problems. Zis is true, yes?"

[Basil Benson]

"Our agency has been known for it's success rate, yes." The 'detective' replied.

[Colette Rosenhof]

"Well monsieur, I..." Colette hesitated for a moment, biting her lip before looking back at Basil. It seemed she was trying her hand at acting.

"I will be upfront with you monsieur, as I believe zat time may be of ze essence. An individual unknown to me is demanding payment in exchange for zeir silence. Zey have photos zat I would prefer did not find zeir way into ze hands of certain individuals. And while ze amount zey ask for is..., manageable, I fear zat over time zey may ask again, and again. I am not a wealzy woman monsieur, but I can afford to pay a little more to see zat zis issue is taken care of; permanently."

[Basil Benson]

The man nodded his head, then looked at Basil. "And you?"

"Me?" Basil paused for a moment. "Bazyli Stolarz. Madamoiselle's parents hired me to look after her in their absence. Seems I am doing a very poor job of it." He chuckled.

The 'detective' smirked at the joke, but then refocused on Colette.

"What kind of men are we looking for? Why are they so interested in blackmailing you specifically?"

[Colette Rosenhof]

"I wish I knew, zeir letter did not mention names. As for zeir reason? I... I receive a small stipend from my parents, to augment my income. My parents are not exceptionally wealzy but zey have money. I believe zat zese persons know zis and wish to siphon funds from my parents zhrough me."

[Basil Benson]

The detective mulled it over a bit, but must have felt this was sufficient enough. He stood, and moved towards the bookcase.

"We'll get on the case immediately.

In the meantime..." He pulled a book on the shelf, and it slid away, revealing their end goal, the bar.

"Relax, have yourself a drink. Try to take your mind off your predicament."

Once they were past the bookcase, it fed out into a little underground establishment. Furnished with bric-a-brac and antiquities of all kinds, it's green painted walls helped bounce the completely artificial light about the place. The room they were in had the actual bar, but from where they stood they could see another, larger room with a small stage.

Basil clapped his hands together, and the circular motion his cuffs were making was suggesting he was wringing his hands.

"Let's get pissed." He stated, looking at his date.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette tried her best to hide her giddiness, forcing a dour expression as she thanked the detective for his kindness. She was barely past their host before she was clinging to Basil's arm, staring at all the little bobbles and features with a sense of wide-eyed wonderment.

"Ooh, zis is so exciting!" She whispered.

[Basil Benson]

Basil lead her to an empty table meant for two patrons in the section of the bar with the stage which had a pretty decent view of it, probably only empty because of the fact there weren't very many pairs beyond the two of them. They did get a few stares, but mostly the other patrons were concerning themselves with their own festivities and less about the two mutants that just came in.

Most of the other bar customers seemed to be making an attempt to 'fit in' as well, but only a few so well as the two of them.

Basil would pull out Colette's chair for her since this was an option now, letting her have the seat with a better view.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette once again smoothed out her dress skirt before she took the seat offered to her, leaning over the table as her date seated himself in turn.

"Zis is an incredible place Basil. Have you been here before?"

[Basil Benson]

"Nope!" He stated plucking up a menu to look over.

"I just know tonight's entertainment. Hadn't seen them in awhile and thought it might be something you might enjoy.

If I'm wrong then I suspect I'll be taking the tube home alone tonight." He chuckles ruefully.

"How does ice cream and waffles sound? With strawberries?"

[Colette Rosenhof]

"I somehow doubt zat you would take me to a show I would not enjoy Basil. At ze very worst it will be... unexpected?"

Her eyes lit up at the description of the dessert her date proposed. "Zat... sounds amazing." She said in a hushed tone. "Waffles and ice cream? Will zey do zis?"

[Basil Benson]

Basil flipped the menu around.

"It's on here." He stated, shrugging. "Also, how do you feel about sangria? It's the only batch drink I see on the list..."

[Colette Rosenhof]

For some reason Colette had thought Basil had enough pull to make restaurants create whatever he asked for. A little fantasy perhaps, somehow it seemed more plausible than actually being on the menu.

"Oh, I do not zink I have had sangria before. Is it good?"

[Basil Benson]

Basil probably could do that, but it wasn't in his style. He was more likely to just go to the places with the things he wanted than to make a place without the things get the things. Which is probably why he was allowed in regular people establishments like this one instead of being shamed out of them for being a rich shithead.

Well that and no one being able to ID him.

"It's fruit wine, this one says it's watermelon and peach. Comes in a pitcher with two glasses.

Weeeee could make it one Madame sized cocktail and piiinnnttt..." He teased playfully.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette grins, resting her chin upon the base of her palm with fingers upon her cheek. "Now you are just trying to butter me up. Zat is ze phrase, yes? Well, it is working."

[Basil Benson]

Basil made a dismissive noise.

"Tshh. Silly Madame. Butter doesn't taste good on ladies."

A waitress showed up and Basil ordered exactly what he said he would, the dessert, Colette's 'cocktail' with a glass (for the sake of politeness), and a pint of Meantime Raspberry Wheat.

All the things he promised would show up in short order, and Basil would immediately start tucking into his pint downing half of it immediately in a rather impolite fashion while the waitress she set out Colette's things.

With a refreshed 'Ahhh', Basil set down his drink.

"Gonna need another of these shortly, please and thank you." He stated to the waitress as she walked away.

"Tuck in, love."

[Colette Rosenhof]

"And to zink, at ze moment I resemble a packet of butter, no?" Indeed, Colette was still of a vibrantly yellow-orange hue, but it was slowly taking on more of her usual pinkness as the night progressed. And of course her face lit up at the sight of the vibrantly red drink that was set down in front of her. It wouldn't take a genius to figure out that this girl liked her drinks colourful, plentiful, and sweet; right now Basil was capitalizing on all three. She poured herself a glass and took a long sip, watching Basil before she began to carefully maneuver some ice cream and strawberry onto a piece of waffle with her spoon.

"You're really getting into character Basil, are you not? A hard working man such as yourself has earned himself a drink." As she raised the spoonful of food to her mouth her body became opaque again; common courtesy. The expression on her face was like that of a gourmand sampling beluga caviar. Just utter satisfaction, there was even a tear in the corner of her eye. The vibrant red of the wine was already beginning to further progress the de-currying process.

[Basil Benson]

"Hard working or hardly?" He joked. Sipping his beer, he watched her work on her dessert with amusement.

"Would you like to know one of my favorite things about you?"

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette paused in mid spooning motion, looking up from her dessert.

"I... yes. Yes I would." She replied in an almost hushed tone.

[Basil Benson]

"Anytime you experience something new, it's the best thing you've ever had, seen, or done.

Until the next new thing.

You make everything an adventure." It sounded like it was meant as a compliment.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette looked down bashfully as Basil spoke, shifting in her chair. It was a little bit of time before she placed her hand on her spoon again.

"Zis is because... at an early age, I learned zat I was very different from ozers.Until six monzs ago, I zought zat I would spend ze rest of my life living in a modest flat in France. Zat my parents would be ze only people who would ever look at me wiz any sort of affection, or anyzing more zan contempt and disgust. I believed zat all of ze simple pleasures of sights and foods would forever remain for me only to be read about in books or watched online. But since I have come to zis school a new world has opened up for me. Everyzing is ze best zing ever because I can remember... not having zese zings. And I may never be able to have zem again."

She rubbed her eye with a gloved hand. "Pardon me Basil, I am far too sentimental. You have been so incredibly kind to me, and now I am dampening zis jovial atmosphere. Someday, I shall be able to properly show you how much I appreciate all you have done for me."

[Basil Benson]

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I meant it as a compliment." He blurted out somehow sounding calm and panicked at the same time. He paused as well for several moments, taking great care to pick out the next words to pass his lips.

"There's an antiquated word that comes to mind, Quaintrelle. Have you heard this word before?"

[Colette Rosenhof]

"I am not upset Basil." Colette smiled despite the little tears. "And it was very sweet of you to say. I just - so many good zings at once can be a little - overwhelming? Emotions building and building and zen zey just get out however zey can? I do not know how to describe it better zan zat."

She polished off the last of her glass of Sangria, pouring herself another as Basil spoke.

"I do not recall ever having heard zis word before. Is it some manner of cake?"

[Basil Benson]

"It's an obscure slang word. The best guess as to it's origin is that it was a Middle English word meant to sound French, and it was a term generally applied to the female equivalent of a dandy.

In their time, they were the living examples of what you would call joie de vivre.

Like you."

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette tittered softly. "You are such a clever young man, Basil. And such a charmer."

[Basil Benson]

Basil's form leant back in his chair, and as he did he blinked back into visability. His arms folded one into the other with his left hand steadying his head, he was stroking his chin with a finger in thought.

The sorts of thoughts that might be fluttering through that pretty head of his were written on his face, the hunger in his eyes being tempered by the playful smirk and the cocked brow.

He said nothing.

The house lights dropped around them but the low light still painted his silhouette, the edges of his smirk the only thing Colette could make out with his back turned to what light remains in the room.


As a gentleman took to the stage, he greeted the crowd by use of a microphone and the bar's sound system. He was wearing a dress shirt, a pastel rainbow bowtie, and some of the tightest leather drainpipes man could create (though science may have played a role in it).

"Good evening lords and ladies and anyone in-between, undecided, or not of a gentle nature! How we all doing tonight?!"

It was customary to cheer at such a question, and while the crowd in attendance did, Basil went invisible.

And followed by quickly moving his chair to Colette's left instead of across from her so he wasn't blocking her view.

No going back now, chappy. He thought to himself.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette almost made a little sound of disappointment as the house lights hid Basil's visage. After all, he'd gone so long being unseen because of his powers, it didn't seem fair that now that he WAS visible he was obscured by darkness.

Still, she sidled up next to him all the same, the few lights in the place reflected off of her shiny surface like a Christmas bauble.

[Basil Benson]

The man on the stage continued on with his partially scripted conversation after the applause died down. Now that Colette wasn't distracted with her pretty prince of a boyfriend, she'd notice the man on stage had something tucked behind his back. He has a coif of strong red hair somehow more fabulous than her dates.

"We're glad to have you all here tonight and we greatly appreciate the Detective Agency hosting us tonight. We've got a great show for you tonight, but before we start let me give you a little explanation of what's going down around here.

We are Captain Batiste's Painted Ladies, but more appropriately-" With a flourish, the man revealed what was kept behind his back, a Naval Captain's hat. "- I'm the Captain. Which really, makes me Master of Ceremonies. Assisting me tonight in my duties will be Lieutenant Buratto Filet' 'Fishnets' Battenberg, but if that mouthful is too much for you then remember that we all just call her Louie.

But I can't say things about Louie that she couldn't better say herself so I'll let her do just that! " ' Batiste' turned the stage over to the first performer, who was dressed up (body paint included) to look like a mouse that might seem vaguely familiar to Colette.

A man not 'the captain' took the open piano to play, and when she opened her mouth to accompany him in song, Colette might quickly get an idea of where this was going.

"Dearest friends,
Dear Gentlemen,
Listen to my song,
Life out here's been hard for you,
Life has made you strong,
Let me lift the mood,
With my attitude..."

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette furrowed her brow at this strange display, unsure of what she was about to see until the term "painted ladies" came into play. Her Sangria-red hue managed to darken still, until her face showed an expression of sudden understanding, a sort of Eureka moment.

"A mouse, burlesque, a detective, and Basil... zis is ze Great Mouse Detective." Had she not been restraining herself, her hushed whisper would have been quite distracting to the other patrons. "Did you plan zings to be zis way?"

[Basil Benson]

"Not exactly. I just knew this one was supposed to be animation themed. Cartoons seem to be your bag." He whispered back, sounding a bit amused.

"But this isn't a show for children... Should we cut out before her top comes off?" Basil asked, testing the waters in case he had a chance to abandon ship if he still needed it.

[Colette Rosenhof]

"Oh please Basil, I may have lived a sheltered life but zis will not be my first time witnessing ze female form. How do you zink I molded my own?" Colette sipped her beverage and turned her gaze back to the stage.

[Basil Benson]

"What if they aren't all female, love?" Basil countered, the spectacle of the show unfolding before them.

[Colette Rosenhof]

"My point remains valid."

Well, she was a shapeshifter after all, of sorts.

[Basil Benson]

That statement caused Basil quite a bit of inner turmoil, but he decided to squash it for the moment and let Colette watch. Sooner or later the music would get loud enough proper conversation wasn't going to be possible anyways.

He did this by finishing his pint and handing the glass to the waitress as she came around with his next one.

As Basil had stated, the show was consistently themed to cartoons now considered nostalgic and often times characterised as 'sexy', mostly of the female variety but a few men, all portrayed by 'The Captain'. There was an act for Ms Bellum, Gadget (also by Louie) Betty Boop, Velma, Princess Jasmine, Betty Rubble, Tinkerbell, Red from the Tex Avery shorts, Ursula, Hello Nurse, Tuxedo Mask, Harley Quinn, Emeralda, and a dual act between the Captain and Louie portraying Penelope Pussycat and Pepe Le Pew set to 'Bad Romance'.
There was only one modern entry on the roster of characters portrayed, Sapphire and Ruby from Stephen Universe.

The acts were mostly strip teases as had become common place in burlesques, but a few of the girls weren't dancers but singers. On the occasions they were singers, the girls weren't taking off their clothes which caused catcalls encouraging the women to 'take it off', but Basil did not engage in such lewd behavior. Actually, Basil remained silent for most of the show (only applauding at the end of acts as was the standard for performances or laughing at obvious jokes) partially out of respect for the performers, and partially because he was watching Colette like a hawk out of fear she was going to storm out at any moment and with the last thing she said to him still wandering around in his think box.

There was an obvious entry missing from this list of characters, but just after 'Louie' announced the last act, the Captain returned to perform the one that seemed missing. He was wearing a matching sequined suit, again with the impossibly tight pants and a purple bowtie and gloves without a dress shirt underneath. It was like the Joker had a baby with Jessica, but on one level it did work.

The Captain was a ginger.

"You have plenty money and you're handsome too
But you let all those women make a fool of you
Why don't you do right? Like some other men do
Get outta here, and get me some money too."

His act seemed to mimic Jessica's too, flirting with the men in the crowd. The assembled group and chosen individuals both seemed to be taking it just fine, one of them flirted back with 'The Captain' to his amusement.

"Now if you had been better a few years ago
You wouldn't be wandering now from door to door
Why don't you do right? Like some other men do
Get outta here, and get me some money too."

He was sidling up on them now, and if Colette were frightened she'd be made a center of attention, she wasn't. But Basil was. Grabbing his hat off the table where it'd been laid for safety and leaning across it, The Captain reached out and grabbed Basil by the tie, pulling him towards him as if things were about to get saucy.

"Why don't you do right? Like some other men do." As he elongated his last note, he shoved Basil's hat into his face, blinding him temporarily as he walked away.

"Goodnight everyone!" He stated as the crowd cheered him out, The light went out on the Captain and he disappeared.

Now into this third pint, Basil was still fighting his own hat off his face.

[Colette Rosenhof]

Colette was, strangely, enjoying herself. It seemed that her sheltered childhood hadn't translated into conservative morals and sensibilities. She was one of the last to stop applauding after each act, and her tittering laughter lingered into giggles as the crowd's enjoyment faded unto murmurs and conversation. But it wasn't until Basil had his hat shoved over his face that she lost it. The girl howled with laughter, impeding the boy's effort by clinging to his arm, trying to suppress her fit of merriment by burying her face in his sleeve with little success. The fact that the pitcher of Sangria was devoid of it's entire contents, fruit and all, was a mere coincidence of course.

"I zink - ze Cap-i-tan - 'as tak-een a shining to you Basil." She managed between fits of giggling emphasized by a few unladylike snorts, her accent especially pronounced in her slurred speech.

[Basil Benson]

Basil got himself free despite Colette's lack of assistance, tossing his hat on the surface of the table.

"Hmph, has had you mean. Since year three at least. That was most definitely not a coincidence."

He sounded a bit miffed off but nearing the end of his third meant that too likely had nothing to do with the hooch.

[Colette Rosenhof]

"Three years of what? What is not a coincidence Basil?" Colette asked, not understanding what her date was talking about.

[Basil Benson]

"I don't know what you call it in France, but here we refer to our school years by their number." Basil replied, somewhat failing to express himself properly thanks to the booze.

"I think Americans call it third grade if that helps.

Anyways, what I mean to say he's picked on me like this since we were seven."

[Jezabelle Sherlock]

"Well... on ze plus side, he recognized you. So zat means you are staying visible for longer."