Conversations with the Governess
Posted: Mon Nov 02, 2015 3:19 am
Somewhere in Jericho on the evening of September the 25th a cellphone rings, and a cool, collected, female voice that spoke in an Estuary English accent answered.
"Good evening Basil."
"Good evening, Amber."
"Why are you calling?"
"Why indeed... Where are you?"
"Think you can guess?" She asked, holding the phone out so that Basil could hear the background sound, before bringing it back to her ear and laughing only to signal to Basil she was back.
"mmm. Definitely not Freud's salsa night, nothing so pedestrian would suit you. You're in Roppongi, aren't you?"
"Very good Basil. You were always much more observant than any spoiled little monster had the right to be." She paused to let the comment sink in.
"Again, why are you calling?"
"I... don't really know. I suppose I miss you."
"Awwww, how adorable.
Perhaps you should have considered how much you'd miss me before you let your parents kick us out of our flat and left me back out on the streets while you scurried away to asylum."
"They owned it and were letting me stay there rent free. What did you want me to do? I don't have any legal precedent to stay."
"And what about you? Do they own you as well?"
Basil struggled with how to respond. "You knew it was never a permanent situation between us."
"Yes, I did. I did know that. But I also didn't expect it to end the way it did. I figured I'd be given a warning before I had to move on.
And I didn't know you'd lost your spine with your visibility.
Oh well, that's life."
Again, in his fashion, Basil was obviously thinking about something due to pregnant silence.
"I'd like to see you."
"Mmm, I'm sure you do. But mum said no. Wouldn't want to upset mum."
After another long silence between them, she spoke again.
"Listen... You should spend time with the other children like you. Make yourself some mates, ey? You were always whinging about being lonely, now you have all sorts of people you can talk to. "
"You don't understand! They're not like me! These people are dangerous!
There's students here who can read minds and lift twelve times their own body weight. I've seen them in the gym beating the piss out of each other, not to mention the loads of kids coming in and out of infirm. One can't even imagine what goes on in the room labeled 'Danger'.
I can't do anything like what they do! I'm just invisible! And I'm rather bloody rubbish at that to be frank!
And that doesn't even count the really odd ducks... One of the girl's here threatened to maul me over a pile of books!
The only girl interested in talking to me -- and I swear, no porkies-- this girl is made of marmalade or something. She doesn't have any insides, she's entirely transparent pink... except for this thing inside her head that I assume is equivalent to her brain. She's very kind but very French and... it's like talking to a woman made entirely of Haribo."
"I thought you liked Jelly Babies?" She asked, sounding amused.
"... Thanks heaps for ruining that for me!"
"Basil..." She cooed. "Breathe, you're getting all worked up like you do and then you're going to pass out."
"That happened one time!"
"I distinctly remember it happening at least one other time." She replied playfully.
"... That sort of worked up hardly counts. The second time shouldn't be on this tally."
"Are we also striking the activity that lead up to your case of the vapors off the record as well?"
Silence.
"That's what I thought.
Ah, my potential client has arrived, I need to go. Grit your teeth, lift your chin, and keep a stiff upper lip, Basil. Manipulating things to benefit you and keeping your hands clean is what you're best at."
She hung up without saying goodbye. He deserved it.
On a campus near Maldon, a very frustrated young man who had taken very careful steps not to be seen in his car threw his cellphone onto the dash board of his vehicle, and sulked by himself in the car park.
"Good evening Basil."
"Good evening, Amber."
"Why are you calling?"
"Why indeed... Where are you?"
"Think you can guess?" She asked, holding the phone out so that Basil could hear the background sound, before bringing it back to her ear and laughing only to signal to Basil she was back.
"mmm. Definitely not Freud's salsa night, nothing so pedestrian would suit you. You're in Roppongi, aren't you?"
"Very good Basil. You were always much more observant than any spoiled little monster had the right to be." She paused to let the comment sink in.
"Again, why are you calling?"
"I... don't really know. I suppose I miss you."
"Awwww, how adorable.
Perhaps you should have considered how much you'd miss me before you let your parents kick us out of our flat and left me back out on the streets while you scurried away to asylum."
"They owned it and were letting me stay there rent free. What did you want me to do? I don't have any legal precedent to stay."
"And what about you? Do they own you as well?"
Basil struggled with how to respond. "You knew it was never a permanent situation between us."
"Yes, I did. I did know that. But I also didn't expect it to end the way it did. I figured I'd be given a warning before I had to move on.
And I didn't know you'd lost your spine with your visibility.
Oh well, that's life."
Again, in his fashion, Basil was obviously thinking about something due to pregnant silence.
"I'd like to see you."
"Mmm, I'm sure you do. But mum said no. Wouldn't want to upset mum."
After another long silence between them, she spoke again.
"Listen... You should spend time with the other children like you. Make yourself some mates, ey? You were always whinging about being lonely, now you have all sorts of people you can talk to. "
"You don't understand! They're not like me! These people are dangerous!
There's students here who can read minds and lift twelve times their own body weight. I've seen them in the gym beating the piss out of each other, not to mention the loads of kids coming in and out of infirm. One can't even imagine what goes on in the room labeled 'Danger'.
I can't do anything like what they do! I'm just invisible! And I'm rather bloody rubbish at that to be frank!
And that doesn't even count the really odd ducks... One of the girl's here threatened to maul me over a pile of books!
The only girl interested in talking to me -- and I swear, no porkies-- this girl is made of marmalade or something. She doesn't have any insides, she's entirely transparent pink... except for this thing inside her head that I assume is equivalent to her brain. She's very kind but very French and... it's like talking to a woman made entirely of Haribo."
"I thought you liked Jelly Babies?" She asked, sounding amused.
"... Thanks heaps for ruining that for me!"
"Basil..." She cooed. "Breathe, you're getting all worked up like you do and then you're going to pass out."
"That happened one time!"
"I distinctly remember it happening at least one other time." She replied playfully.
"... That sort of worked up hardly counts. The second time shouldn't be on this tally."
"Are we also striking the activity that lead up to your case of the vapors off the record as well?"
Silence.
"That's what I thought.
Ah, my potential client has arrived, I need to go. Grit your teeth, lift your chin, and keep a stiff upper lip, Basil. Manipulating things to benefit you and keeping your hands clean is what you're best at."
She hung up without saying goodbye. He deserved it.
On a campus near Maldon, a very frustrated young man who had taken very careful steps not to be seen in his car threw his cellphone onto the dash board of his vehicle, and sulked by himself in the car park.