BBC - US Election Coverage

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BBC - US Election Coverage

Postby Narrator » Thu Sep 29, 2016 3:18 pm

"...We are now past the first debates and analysts disagree over who won. While common sense would dictate that the incumbent President Oswald clearly won, many are claiming he failed to address numerous issues facing our great nation. Meanwhile presidential candidate Tucket continued to be belligerent, dodge questions and seemed to have little to no understanding of the topics discussed. He often veered off-topic and started rambling about loosely related topics, especially his pet issue of Mutant terrorism."

The screen cuts to an excerpt of the actual debates and the orange visage of Mr. Tucket.

"They come here, lots of them are even born here, most even, they're here and a lot of them are murderers and terrorists. I'm sure there's some good ones but then they blow up buildings, attack the police. Look what happened in Baltimore. We're not safe. They could, some of them I hear they walk through walls, maybe even more. You can't fire a gun at something like that. What good does it do to know who they are, the registration act, I mean it's an okay act, but what we need to do is more, we need to be doing more to protect our fellow Americans from these things like people who can throw cars with their mind, it's dangerous. We need programs, the best ones, to deal with these things. I don't trust a bald guy who can read minds with these things, there's no oversight, what is he doing? What we need is for the government to step in with a strong hand."

"You've been endorsed by Vladimir Putin and a couple month ago you claimed Russia was doing, and I quote, great things. They recently opened their borders to mutants. Isn't that the exact opposite of what you're suggesting here?" the moderator cuts in after several attempts of being talked over.

"Well that's their choice if they want to do things that way, I still think Russia has some great ideas, they have a strong leadership and that's important--"

"Yes, but they also recently tried to move troops into the Ukraine and they are currently occupying Crimea. Is that what strong leadership means?" the moderator manages to interject.

"Look if you want to be taken seriously, I mean that's something that is necessary sometimes. I don't think it's great, but that's where it's good that I have such a good relationship, the best relationship, really, with Vladimir Putin because that's something that'll have to be talked about. But that's like, imagine we decide that all the drugs and mutants and criminals from Mexico, by the way, you can't tell me there's not a relation there, between drugs and these mutants, someone should look into that and figure out if this isn't drugs causing people to be born as freaks, but if there was and then we need to step in and, say, help sort things out there. I don't think anybody should be trying to tell us what to do there either, right?"


Back to the BBC anchor. "And there you have it. A rambling point about a complex topic and thinly veiled threats aimed at both Mutants and Mexico for some reason. Meanwhile in the UK people have begun to speak up. Among them our very own Nigel Farage who recently came out in support of Mr. Tucket because that is apparently the world we live in now."

Another cut to a clip from what appears to be some sort of rally.

"All I'm saying is that he has the right idea. Mutant refugees are flooding our countries from all over Europe and even the US. They're on to them over there and so they come to us and we take them in without question. They come to us to start violent protests like the one in London, they're being harbored in schools that have cut deals with our government. These are terrorist cells that are just waiting to strike and they're flocking to us because other countries are done putting up with them. Do we want to be like Russia? There's something you wouldn't have expected to hear from the Liberals. We have to ensure that Great Britain is safe for us first and that means sending those muties back where they came from and tell Europe and the rest of the world that we won't be their dumping ground anymore. I say let Russia deal with these abominations if they want them so badly."
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