Xaviers!

In spite of her lovely night with Tereza and Viv, Sam's mood was soured by the brief scare that almost ruined the night. Everybody was still walking wounded, and she had no idea if Natalie and the headmistress had caught whoever had been using Cerebra.

Cerebra was out of commission, too. There was no chance of looking for Miriam any time soon, and if she'd done anything to Will, she couldn't even talk to him of late.

And Tereza was sequestered away for the moon.

So what use am I to anybody?

Sam tapes up her fingers and settles in at the drum set. Putting a large pair of headphones on, she launches into furious practice.

Having something to focus on helps. The patterned movement channeled into an almost cathartic outburst. As a shapeshifter it's easy to be hyper-aware of your body but this seems to help her regain a more conscious control over her muscles, almost as if a cramp she didn't even know was there is easing up a little. Some of the unease that has plagued her about being at odds with herself fades, like the music is helping her come to a better accord with herself, at least for a moment. Muscles and tendons shift and adjust to the movements almost on their own, making the grip on the drumsticks more secure, the repeated movements flow more easily and for a while, immersed in the music everything seems like it could be okay, all the tensions and uncertainties solvable.

It's a welcome feeling to Sam, and as such she lets herself sink into it more than a little. It's not all that different from when she's in the middle of a fight. Sometimes everything just flows, and she needs that right now as she drums.

As she's drumming she starts humming an accompanying melody. Not really intentionally, almost more as if muscles are moving on their own to produce kind of a strange, almost ebbing and flowing kind of hymn to go along with the drum-beats.

Sam blinks in confusion as she slowly becomes aware of it. She thumbs the pause button on her phone and slips off her headphones with a shrug.

Then she starts right back into drumming.

I see now why the Phantom Queen is so placid...
The battles she fights are few and far.
She doesn't reside where war and death rage.

The thoughts shoot through Sam's head like an earworm that just popped into her head. They're a little disjointed and muddled, but she can't really deny them either.

But the urge is there.
To hurt, to tear.
And witness the struggle that war brings to bear.

The thoughts certainly seem to skew more towards lyrics now than before. Still kind of... brutal, but maybe Tereza's taste in music was getting to her a bit. Those could definitely fit into a Metal song of some sort.

...but only the people that deserve it. War for war's sake is... pointless.

But there are doubts in her mind, remembering how she felt when she was last in Cerebra.

...but the Morrigan's favor has to mean something.

...and my inner muse has stopped rhyming.

Sam lowers the drumsticks, casting her mind about her in confusion.

There's nobody around. She can distantly feel the minds of other students in the building and beyond if she flexes her mental muscles, but nothing else.

How demanding, to expect a fully formed ballad to spring forth perfected and in accord with itself. You know how hard assent can be, do you not?

I've had conversations with myself before, but you don't feel like one of the ones I'm familiar with.

Of course, there's some anxiety on Sam's part that she perhaps hasn't reached the bottom of the rabbit hole on parts of herself she can talk with.

Does it frighten you?

There's almost a feeling of amusement swimming along with the thought.

You're so hesitant. Wary. Of losing yourself?

...well it's been less than a year I've been talking to the voices inside my head.

And it just so happened that they'd cropped up right as she'd managed to shut out most of the voices outside it.

All the world is a voice in your head, is it not?

As she's sitting there, zoned out and having a conversation with herself, her phone buzzes with a message.

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Head-Mistress:
Samantha, when was the last time you used Cerebra?

Sam blinks, startled and not really processing until the second buzz.

Marshaling her thoughts, she responds.

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Not since before break, why?

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That wasn't me.

A pause.

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At least, I'm pretty sure that wasn't me.

They call crazy what their minds can't comprehend. Don't let them sully what you should wear proudly. The voice in Sam's head helpfully provides.

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Just keep me posted, okay?

Sam lets out a frustrated sigh, a death-grip on her phone.