Til Your Heart Goes Numb

[Wanda Johansson]

She'd thought about visiting during the day, just to be safe, but she decided against it. She wouldn't appreciate someone waking her up in the middle of the night, so she decided to extend the same courtesy to Miriam. She pauses for a second before knocking on the door, gathering her thoughts together. Then, she gives the door a brisk knock.

[Miriam Bell]

Miriam is lieing on her bed which has been converted into a four-post bed with drapes. Or the mockery of one anyway. Still better than a bloody coffin at least. She actively tried to ignore the sensation of Wanda's mind coming within her range. More so when she actually stops in front of her door. If her heart was still beating it might have stopped along with her right then and there. She can sense the hesitation and she almost wishes Wanda would just start walking again and it takes conscious effort not to let that desire push out and assert itself on Wanda's mind.

By the time Wanda knocks she's steeled herself to the point that her voice doesn't sound surprised or nervous. "Come in."

[Wanda Johansson]

Wanda opens the door, looking around before finally seeing Miriam. Her mind sorts through a sequence of things before she finally says, "I think we should talk."

[Miriam Bell]

"What's there to say... I'm sorry?" she says, continuing to stare at the ceiling, arms loosely crossed on her stomach.

[Wanda Johansson]

"Are you?" Wanda asks, leaning against the inside of the door frame. "Why did you do it?"

[Miriam Bell]

"Because I didn't want you to hurt. I am very obviously bad for you, but that's on me and you don't deserve to suffer for it..."

[Wanda Johansson]

"But you took away my choice in the matter. Didn't I deserve to have a choice?"

[Miriam Bell]

"I don't think you would have agreed to anything. You weren't exactly yourself at the time..."

[Wanda Johansson]

"So that necessitated removing my memories?" Wanda crosses her arms.

[Miriam Bell]

"I'm not saying it was the best thing I ever did. That's why I fixed it, okay?" she says, turning on her side to face the wall.

[Wanda Johansson]

Wanda's voice gets sharp. "And you even made that decision for me. You're still deciding what it is I need. I'm not some child you have to shepherd, Miriam."

[Miriam Bell]

"Fine, what do you want? Want me to take the memories away again? Did I screw that up too?" she says, finally sitting up and whirling around to face Wanda.

[Wanda Johansson]

"No, my memories are fine right where they are." She takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose for a moment. "I want you to stop treating me like you know what's best. That's the only way we *might* be able to come to any sort of friendship."

[Miriam Bell]

"I'm getting a very mixed message about the whole returning your memories thing here."

[Wanda Johansson]

"Fine. Be that way. If you don't want to be friends, I'm not going to force you. I just thought I'd give you the chance." She straightens up from leaning on the door frame, turning to go.

[Miriam Bell]

"It's easier if you just hate me..." Miriam mumbles.

[Wanda Johansson]

"You violated my trust. Of course I'm angry with you," Wanda says over her shoulder. "But hate is... poisonous."

[Miriam Bell]

"Just... go. Be with your German wolf-lady. I'm sure she won't hurt you as badly as I did."

[Wanda Johansson]

"No, she won't," Wanda says as she steps out of sight. Because she takes what I want into account.