[Relationship] No One Mourns

[Samantha McManus]

"So you like a bit of a challenge yourself? I think I can take that as a compliment."

[Miriam Bell]

"Challenge makes it sound so... competitive. In the end it's all just make-believe anyway but it's more fun that way." For all her trying to be cocky about it and talking around things a little it's very obvious that underneath she's at least a little bit concerned about what this means compared to a certain less moral version of her. Because there's definitely more than she's letting on, clamped down on by the awareness of how easy it can be for things unsaid to pass between two telepaths.

[Samantha McManus]

"Do you want to talk about it? Because as nice as it is to have you talking to me more there's still things you want to keep back, aren't there?"

[Miriam Bell]

"Do I want to? Bloody hell no. How am I supposed to give you grief about your doppelgaengers and alternate reality offspring if I admit the idea of having... areas of interest in common with mine bothers me?"

[Samantha McManus]

"Oh aye, nothing more embarrassing than shared interests."

[Miriam Bell]

"Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, Sam. There's extremes of being in control that go well past 'embarrassing'."

[Samantha McManus]

"...oh. You mean... ah."

"You're not her, Miriam."

[Miriam Bell]

"Yes, I know. It's not... I don't think it's some kind of fated bullcrap." she sighs, a little in annoyance with Sam and a bit with herself for struggling to explain herself. "I guess I can kind of see the road there? That's not quite right either, I just... know how easy it is. Especially when what are my thoughts and what are the other person's can get so blurry. It feels like one wrong thought from me could warp what I think you're okay with. What... other people are okay with."

[Samantha McManus]

"I mean I know it's... it's not easy to see some kind of funhouse mirror of yourself and notice there's parts you recognize. I get that, believe me I do."

[Miriam Bell]

"I know, otherwise I'm not sure we'd be having this conversation to begin with. But I doubt you feel particularly tempted by living in a bog like some kind of horrible gremlin, yeah?"

[Samantha McManus]

"But that's not the familiar bit, is it? The bit you recognize is always a bit further back."

[Miriam Bell]

"Maybe... Fortunately I haven't come face to face and Will's memories are focused on more immediate things. Or... are you talking about 'further' back? As in our powers?"

[Samantha McManus]

"I mean the part that bothers you isn't seeing where they ended up, it's seeing where they started veering off that way and realizing... well, you could've. And you still might."

[Miriam Bell]

"Yeah. And when that veering is something I enjoy then... well you get the problem."

[Samantha McManus]

"There's still been times when I... well, I liked that tension between us, aye? Like when we went dancing."

[Miriam Bell]

"Oh so the hero enjoys when she's being pushed around?" she grins. Sure, she was still worried but she had to admit this had a certain appeal. And that's what Sam did, right? Be the hero and keep people from going over the edge? Hell she already had, back when Miriam had joined up with Trinity. She'd just taken it personally back then. "I think I can work with that."

[Samantha McManus]

"I didn't think the only thing you liked about that night was the revelation that I can comb the twigs and leaves out of my hair on occasion," she teases.

[Miriam Bell]

"It was nice to see you could dress like a civilized person." she smirks. "What do you say, is there room for the dark and mysterious villain you keep from going off the deep end even though or perhaps because she keeps pushing your buttons?" She was full-on grinning now. Perhaps this discussing boundaries thing didn't have to be so terrifying if it was dressed up right...

[Samantha McManus]

"Not everything needs to be framed in a cape-and-tights context, unless you're into that."

[Miriam Bell]

And just like that her grin falters and she pushes herself off of the couch.

"It's not... it's not about that. I'm just trying to find some context that's... easier to handle. You really are frustrating sometimes, you know that?"

[Samantha McManus]

"Look, it's not a criticism, I just thought we were having a bit of fun there."

"But it doesn't need to be about that, aye? I don't know how good I am at being the responsible backstop in this situation, but I care enough about you to try."

[Miriam Bell]

"At the very least your indulgences are different. Wilder. And I think what I'm into is the push and pull, not the... theatrics." she gesticulates to try and distract herself from the topic of conversation. She shouldn't feel this awkward about it. She should be cool and composed, damnit.

[Samantha McManus]

"So maybe let's put it this way: together we wind up places neither of us would've thought of on our own, and we like that. Simple enough?"

[Miriam Bell]

"I... can work with that." she says, secretly glad that Sam is working with her here.

"And just for the record, this kind of... defining of things is profoundly irritating. I don't care how necessary it is, it feels like it's sapping away all the thrill and mystery." she huffs, of course mainly meaning it takes all the mystery out of herself, but she's not unpacking that right now.

[Samantha McManus]

"Alright, we can have mystery and gothic architecture, but the ghosts will get a look if they keep me up," she smirks.

[Miriam Bell]

"One would hope that a proper haunting would spur you into doing your self-proclaimed job as Shepherd of the Slain or what-have-you." she says, pretending she doesn't know the details of what the Morrigan is as if she didn't put 'Mnemosyne' as her own moniker, unused at it is most of the time.

[Samantha McManus]

"Well I know it's not as glamorous as being the font from which all art and science springs, but I guess even the cosmos needs a ratcatcher."

[Miriam Bell]

"From each according to their abilities." she smirks, radiating a certain teasing smugness.

[Samantha McManus]

"Oh I'm sure it's quite lovely, but when you get rats..."

[Miriam Bell]

"...you call someone else to deal with them. Okay I'm beginning to see how you end up involved in all the heroics."

[Samantha McManus]

"Aye, and some of it just... feels like it needs to be done?"

[Miriam Bell]

"Like you're expected to or like you need to do it?"

[Samantha McManus]

"I mean, sometimes something just feels... wrong? Like to the point of offense."

"You ah... did for awhile, but I adjusted."

[Miriam Bell]

"I'll take that as a compliment rather than you holding your nose at the dead thing next to you out of pity." she says. Miriam figures trying to get ahead of her own worst possible interpretations might help, though it doesn't take the sting out of it entirely. "I know you had something like that going on but I always assumed it was... self-imposed rather than something you were shouldered with."

[Samantha McManus]

"I'm not a robot by any means, but anyone's got... well, urges, aye? Mine are just different."

[Miriam Bell]

"Well I just... kind of chose my mutant name and assumed you did the same and modeled everything else after that 'affectation'. I hadn't thought about it being something that aligned with how you were feeling. I'm... a pretty shit telepath sometimes."

[Samantha McManus]

"I don't think telepathy teaches you much about some of the shite we've been through, aye?"

[Miriam Bell]

"No, but you'd think it would make me be better at seeing other peoples' perspectives."

[Samantha McManus]

"When some parts of that perspective seem absurd to even me, I think you can be forgiven."

[Miriam Bell]

"Not eager to chase those urges down too far then?"