Post-Issue 2: Hanging out in the Bar

[Will Stanton]

"Do...do you need to go to the infirmary? I don't want you to get sick..."

[Miriam Bell]

"What? No, it's a mental thing. Keeping my own thoughts straight. Mental discipline so I don't start believing I'm Norma again." she jokes and it falls more or less entirely flat.

[Will Stanton]

"Is that...is that a real risk?"

[Miriam Bell]

"Her in particular? No. But that's because she's my anchor. A... mantra that keeps my thoughts from mingling with others. Without her it becomes hard to keep others thoughts from bleeding into mine. And vice versa. That's why they kept my telepathy suppressed at first at Muir..."

[Will Stanton]

"So, if you let yourself go, it'd be like we were all thinking for you?"

[Miriam Bell]

"Or with me or as me. It's a give and take, but my mind is better at giving then most other people."

[Will Stanton]

"I'm not sure I understand..."

[Miriam Bell]

"It's push and pull, things get tangled up but whoever is stronger gets the upper hand. When my sister died the... the people around me, the driver of the car, a handful of people who tried to help... They all broke down just as I died. Anybody who got to close just got swept up in what I was feeling. My loss, the driver's guilt, the detached shock of the bystanders, it all swirled together and I forced it onto them. At least until they pulled them away, but I still don't know which of the feelings I remember were mine. I can make an educated guess, but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty. They told me that everyone who got caught in it responded to being called Norma for months afterwards. One of the X-Corp members who later dragged me away was convinced he'd driven the car that hit Norma. He knows he didn't. Couldn't have. But he thinks he did. Because I did. Because I made all of them think they did."

[Will Stanton]

Will was quiet for a moment.

"You said "I". You said, "just as I died. You meant she."

[Miriam Bell]

"Yeah... yeah I did." she sighs. "I don't like talking about it because my memories of what happened are all kinds of muddled."

[Will Stanton]

"Well, I apologize for bringing it up, then. Have another drink. On me."

[Miriam Bell]

"Thanks, but it's alright. I won't say I'm over it, but I've made my peace with it as much as I can."

[Will Stanton]

"Well I'm glad. And if you ever need to talk..."

[Miriam Bell]

"Thanks Will, maybe I'll take you up on that." she smiles and clinks her glass against one of the remaining ones.

[Will Stanton]

"Cheers and all," Will said, downing her drink practically in one gulp.

[Miriam Bell]

For a moment Miriam looks almost a bit pensive as she looks at Will. The green-haired girl seems to almost have completely forgotten about what set this off in the first place already. This has to have something to do with the mysterious construct in her mind, but... then why had that looming shadow felt so familiar? In a way it almost felt like the shaping of Will's metaphorical clay in her mindscape had. The way her thoughts guided Will's. Her own will superimposed on Will's. She'd made sure it hadn't caused any distress but technically she hadn't asked for consent before she'd started shoring things up. It was just too easy to mold peoples' minds once far enough in their psyche.

Is it possible she'd lost control without noticing? Done something that warranted such a strong feeling of revulsion and terror? She'd been angry and frustrated with Sam, jealous even, of Will's misguided devotion. It's been years since her last major slip of her anchored sense of self, but... it happened today. How much could she really trust herself? Could she say with absolute certainty that this wasn't her doing? She wants to, but deep down she knows she can't. He'd called her Mel without even noticing and what's disturbing is that she's painfully aware of how she would go about making the conscious mind gloss over inconsistencies like that. It's something she was capable of doing and worse, she's reshaped peoples' minds without recollection before. What if all the experts and tests had missed something? What if she was slipping? As much as she likes to think that her time in Muir is behind her and that the last couple years she'd just been there to finish her education out of convenience, the truth is that this is the first time she's been outside of that controlled environment for any extended period of time.

She swiftly knocks back her drink to suppress a shudder. "Cheers..." she says, but she doesn't feel very cheerful at all.