Xaviers!

A trio of vaguely crablike robots glided along the sidewalk on spherical wheels mounted within their feet. The first was the size of a mouse with a black and white paint job, weaving a playful s-curve ahead of the others. Trying to keep up was a red unit the size of a large, fat housecat, burbling annoyed electronic beeps. And lastly came a large brown machine the size of a large dog, patiently following a few feet behind its faster siblings.

(open)

Will was walking across campus...and stopped.

"Well, what in tarnation do we have here?"

The red one trilled and said in a recorded British voice, "Look alive lads!" They stopped to regard Will and the tiny one zipped his direction.

"Uh....huh. And just who are you supposed to be?"

"The Cavalry!" Red announced in a different soundbite.

Tiny switched to walking mode and stepped closer to Will. It's camera eye twitched up and down as it regarded him. It twittered inquisitively.

The Big Guy waved hello with a bulky manipulator arm.

Will waved back. "And....where do you come from?"

In answer, Red simply played the theme from Jaws.

"...Uh-huh. Very helpful there, Red."

"Science!" Red proclaimed.

The Big Guy motioned to the Point.

"So, sharkboy's got a pod now, huh? Interesting..."

Whale song. Buzzer. Jaws theme.

"No voice synth, huh? Probably not considered a primary function," he said, shrinking down to get a slightly better, up-close view of the bots. "Pretty solid construction, though..."

Baby noises.

Tiny curiously reached for Will with one of its manipulators.

"Woah, look with your eyes, not with your hands," Will said, trying to push the manipulator away.

Red and Tiny exchange bursts of beeps before Tiny pulls away with a crestfallen warble. Clearly Red was the boss of the robotic trio when Tosh wasn't supervising. Assuming he wasn't doing so remotely, anyway.

"So, what do you guys DO, anyway?"

"Do you require assistance?" Red asked with another clip.

"I don't, but that's what you do? Help people?"

They all bob up and down in seemingly happy affirmation. "We exist..." Red began before an extended pause. A different clip pronounced "To Serve Man, it's... it's a cookbook!"

Hey. It's still learning, okay?

"...are those preloaded clips? Because that raises further questions."

"Damnit. I thought I fixed that," came Tosh's voice from Red.

"Tosh!

...Stupid question, but radio or brain-transfer?"

"Radio. I'm not Cam," he answered, only slightly indignantly.

"Hey, around here, you never know! It's a fair question."

"I don't think Haley would appreciate me becoming a robot."

"Depends on which options you get installed at the dealer."

"Please don't give these guys that image," he joked. "They're very impressionable."

"I didn't say anything! Your mind goes where your mind goes."

"I suppose you meant a cappuccino machine then?" he asked with an obvious unseen smirk.

"I thought you DIDN'T want me to give impressionable images to your robots?"

"What's wrong with cappuccino?" he asked.

"Damn I need coffee," Red said in a sound clip of Tosh with music in the background.

"... Did Jeeves just soundbite me?" a surprised Tosh asked.

"I was thinking more of the dispensary.

And yes, yes it did."

"I didn't even know it had recorded me. That's... its first truly independent action..." he said with scientific wonder, "The new learning algorithms are working faster than anticipated."