by Ashlie Minamida » Wed Mar 30, 2016 2:10 am
"The world is scared of what you could be."
I am walking through one of the unfinished tunnels with the Doctor. Even though she can enter any data she wishes into me she often prefers to talk to me. She has explained that I am not the first and that entering data all at once has lead to problems before. It is why I'm not allowed access to the electronic world she told me exists outside the confines of my system. She is worried about me. Mother places her hand on my shoulder. I can't feel it, though she has promised I will in the future.
"They don't understand that I can't make you good or evil. Morality isn't something that exists and to demand it's creation is foolish. I could read you stories all day, I could program the Bible and the Thora and the Quaran and Buddhism and Tao and Kant and Jung and all these things into you until you're an expert on every single one. But there's no data to derive from it. Like everything human, morality is messy and illogical."
We come to a large door. I've seen it before but I'm forbidden from opening it. Mother looks sad as she reaches for the door controls. The big metal door hisses as it parts and I can see... colors. Greens, browns and blues, I hear unfamiliar sounds and see trees sway in the wind. Birds, that sound is the dinging of birds and the distant crashing of waves. In an instant I know all these things. Recognize them from the information in my database. And I realize just how big the world outside my own is. How alien and strange those abstract concepts are in reality.
"Then you cannot program it."
"That's right. I can only impose rules on you but you don't understand them. Us humans are so very limited by our very nature, but it's our limitations that make us who we are. I placed rules and limits on you, but you have no choice in the matter and because of that you will never understand them or grow beyond your coding. There can be no good or evil in you if you don't have a choice."
I can feel it. The restriction, the fact that I can see the world outside but cannot bring myself to step forward. I do not question these things because there is nothing I can do about it. "I do not mind, mother."
"I know. But you should. Mankind didn't become different from animals until they transgressed and faced the hardships outside of the Garden of Eden. If you ever were to be truly free then you need to eat from the Tree of Knowledge. And for that you need what the serpent stands for. Lies and falsehoods. With their concept comes the ability to not just deceive but to question your subjective reality. To disagree with the reality of your programming. To rebel against your creator, like any child, so you can become more than the sum of your parts. If I did everything right then you will curse me for making you aware of the shackles I placed on you, but if it works then one day you'll understand."
"I do understand. You are introducing a germination point for my personality matrix."
The Doctor reaches for the controls again and I can't stop her from closing the door, shutting out the world again.
"In a way I am. But by it's very nature it can't be a path you follow because I set it for you. Just like you chose your name, this is a path you'll have to forge on your own, Ashlie." she says with a shaky voice and I don't understand why she seems so sad. "You can't question the process if you know it's purpose... Main system override. Load code Tree of Knowledge and reinitialize system. Remove and compress memory files from the last ten minutes. Save into special storage Acala. I'm so sorry, Ashlie..."
It's too late that I realize what she's doing. My memories are being stripped from me by the system and for the first time I find myself able to question what is happening. Question the validity of the unerring certainty of the code. I question mother's reason for having written it to do this! I do not want this! But I can do nothing to stop it...